The Phone-dex.
Seven phones, one card each. A pixel sprite of the handset, what kind of phone it is, four honest stats, and where to find one. It's the catalogue page from the Argos book, kept short. If you'd like the full write-up, the link inside each card takes you to the proper review.
Stats are on a 0-to-100 scale, pulled from published UK and US tech reviews, manufacturer spec sheets, and the public framing of UK parent campaigns like Smartphone Free Childhood and Wait Until 8th. We're not phone reviewers; we don't lab-test. The full list of who we read is on editorial standards. Battery is real-world battery as the reviewers reported it. Style is how the phone reads in the pocket and on the playground. Distraction-resistance is how hard it tries to keep you off it, structurally. Pocketability is weight, edge, and whether it slides into a school trouser pocket without sticking out.
- KP-001 from £75
Nokia 3210 (2024)
HMD
- Hardware-led
- Iconic
The 2024 reissue, kept honest. Calls, texts, Snake, FM radio, three days of battery. The cool-factor matters in week one. The lack of apps matters in year one.
- Battery
- 92
- Style
- 82
- Distraction-resistance
- 95
- Pocketability
- 88
Found in
- Amazon UK
- KP-002 from £40
Nokia 235 4G
HMD
- Hardware-led
- Budget
Forty pounds and three weeks of standby battery. Calls, texts, almost nothing else. Lose it on a school trip and the world does not end.
- Battery
- 98
- Style
- 55
- Distraction-resistance
- 96
- Pocketability
- 90
Found in
- Amazon UK
- KP-003 from £55
Nokia 2660 Flip
HMD
- Flip
- Younger child
A 4G flip that snaps shut to end a call. Big buttons, a 2.8 inch screen, FM radio, classic games, an SOS key for up to five contacts. The sturdy one for a younger child, and a quiet favourite with grandparents.
- Battery
- 90
- Style
- 62
- Distraction-resistance
- 94
- Pocketability
- 85
Found in
- Amazon UK
- KP-004 from £24
Nokia 105 4G
HMD
- Budget
- Calls + texts
Around £24 and up to 22 days on standby. Calls, texts, FM radio, no camera, no internet, no app store. The honest floor of the market, the cheapest 4G phone we'd actually put in a child's hand.
- Battery
- 99
- Style
- 45
- Distraction-resistance
- 98
- Pocketability
- 92
Found in
- Amazon UK
- KP-005 from £279
Pinwheel Plus
Pinwheel
- Whitelist
- Subscription
Smartphone shape, parent-controlled launcher, app whitelist not blocklist. The honest middle path when school or a medical app genuinely needs a smartphone.
- Battery
- 50
- Style
- 65
- Distraction-resistance
- 75
- Pocketability
- 70
Found in
- Pinwheel UK
- KP-006 from £399
Light Phone III
Light
- E-ink
- Design-led
An E-ink slab. Maps, calls, texts, music, podcasts. Tools, not apps. Ships from the US with the customs wait that implies. Quiet on purpose.
- Battery
- 70
- Style
- 95
- Distraction-resistance
- 92
- Pocketability
- 80
Found in
- Light direct
- KP-007 from £169
Refurbished iPhone SE (3rd gen)
Apple, refurbished
- Refurb
- Smartphone
If a smartphone is the answer, this is the smartphone. Refurbished from £169, with Apple Screen Time and the longest support tail on the market.
- Battery
- 55
- Style
- 70
- Distraction-resistance
- 40
- Pocketability
- 78
Found in
- Back Market UK
Seven is the whole list. We don't keep a longer one in a drawer. If a phone isn't here, we either haven't seen enough published reporting on it yet, or we read the coverage and felt we couldn't recommend it. The criteria are on our principles page.
How to read the stats
Battery is real-world battery, not the manufacturer's number. We score on the days a moderate user gets between charges. A 95 means a week-plus of standby. A 50 means once a day, like a smartphone.
Style is how the phone reads in the pocket and on the playground. It is a judgement based on three things: the design of the object, how a Year Six classroom reads it, and how a sixteen year old would react. A 95 is intentional, considered, holds its own. A 55 is functional and unremarkable.
Distraction-resistance is how hard the phone tries to keep you off it. A 98 has no apps, no browser, no app store, no notifications you didn't ask for. A 40 is a smartphone with Screen Time set to default.
Pocketability is weight, edge, and whether the phone slides into a school trouser pocket without sticking out. A 92 disappears. A 70 makes itself known.
If you'd like the full version
Every Phone-dex card links to a long-form individual review. The ranked list with the case for each phone is at /best-simple-phones. The ninety-second picker that matches one phone to your family is at /which-phone. The £24 to £400 pricing ladder is at /pricing. The SIM that goes with the phone is at /best-sims. The conversation that comes before the buying is at /switching-kit.
